ABOUT LAST NIGHT - MINDLESS, DISCONNECTED AND DEEPER THAN EVER BEFORE

After the training session with my Bad Pet last night, I quickly went to find my Master Mats to see him again. He had hinted that he had plans to train me as well. It had been a long time since I had a training session myself. Couldn't wait. 

I called up Master. He answered cool and collect. He always does. Soon as he spoke, it was clear he was focused on the task at hand of training his pet. He went right to it. 

With just two words, I was already very much drifting. It was getting harder to think. He continue to speak softly. Then he said it again, those two words. Another wave hit me, taking me deeper, making it more harder to think. My Master, fully aware how his words were affecting me, showed no mercy. He said those two words to me. He said it again and again. Each time he said my trigger, it kept emptying more and more of my mind. I was feeling so very mindless. Could not make sense of his words. It started to be difficult to speak. 

Feeling myself go blank and mindless in trance is not new to me. But what happened next, changed my view of how deep I could go. What happened next, brought new meaning to being "switched off". What happened next was no ordinary hypnotic trick of the mind. No mere switching off of thought. 

No, what happened next was much more intense that just "Switching Off". More like a complete disconnection of my conscious mind. It felt like someone had pulled the plug. I was aware, somehow, of a numb sensation in front of my head, but inside my head. The numb, dull sensation, felt like it was coming from the frontal lobes of my brain. And what I felt, was the complete lack of brain activity in the frontal lobes of my brain. There was a heaviness on my mind, and it felt like there was no activity happening at all in the front portion of my mind. I noticed my eyesight got dark, but I remembered that the room had lights. A slight panic took place. I started to feel a little scared, and I felt as if suddenly I was falling down into a darkness, as if someone pushed me off a dark cliff. I started breathing fast and sounding scared, and panicked, I realized how part of my brain had turned off, and I had become TRULY MINDLESS. 

I exclaimed "Oh my God! I feel so mindless!" I tried to keep calm, but I felt myself losing more of my mind activity and felt myself dropping deeper off into a black abyss with no bottom and no end. I sounded frightened I know. I exclaimed again "oh my god! oh my god".  My Master who was trancing me, heard the panic in my voice. He immediately stopped hypnotizing me, then immediately started trying to wake me up. He tried once. I didn't respond. He tried again, practically yelling at me to wake up. And although he was yelling, his yelling comforted me. Because it reminded me he was with me and I wasn't alone. I stopped being scared. But I didn't wake up. In that deep trance, I spoke and told him I was ok now, and for him not to worry. He still soon gradually woke me up fully, and I felt feelings and activity return back to my mind.  Both me and Master were in awe of what had happened to me in trance. He is concerned still, but I'm curious, and still want to explore the depths of my mind.